I can’t concentrate. That sums things up in a nutshell. I have so many things I need to do, but at the moment, all I can think about is my pre-op appointment today at the hospital.
I only started this blog a bit over a week ago, and already my mind is trying to figure out how to properly blog about this latest medical thing. Is there a proper way? Somehow I doubt it, so instead of wondering about how to do it, I’m just going to do it instead.
I have to have surgery for my right kidney. I found out last Thursday, but needed to digest the news. I knew the surgery was looming out there, having had a decrease in function, but – – –
OK, I’m shaking my head. This feels so bizarre. When I started my blog, I was excited to share my interests, my handmade biz, my hobbies, my cats, my addiction to earrings, and my occasional favorites from Etsy. Somehow this kidney thing doesn’t quite fit into any one of those neat and tidy little categories.
Perhaps this is an example of my own “word of the year” for 2012, which was also my chosen word for 2011: Messy. As in be more messy. As in everything is never quite perfect, so why keep waiting until it is?
You can tweak and tweak a design all you want, or edit a document over and over again, but in the end all you’re doing is delaying the time it is released into the world. So why not be more messy about things and just see what happens? (And no I’m not suggesting a blog post with many typos, a handmade card with a bent edge. Those aren’t examples of messy, those are examples of not caring, and another topic for another day.)
Maybe there is a new category, next to those neat and tidy ones mentioned earlier, called Messy.
And, of course if my blog’s name is The Shed, I should be able to shed some inhibitions about sharing too. (Note to self, another thing on the list: create a banner for this blog with The Shed in title.)
The surgery is coming up in two weeks, and this week will be some exams and tests to make sure I’m “good to go” for the surgery. I’ve had surgery before, unfortunately quite a few times including two last year, but luckily all have been out-patient – even my surgeries for cervical cancer back in the early ’90s – so there was always the known and calming factor that I’d be in my own bed by that evening, cared for by husband and cats.
Not this time. This time I’ll be in the hospital for approx 4 days after surgery, with a minimum 3 to 4 week recovery. Yes, husband will be there thankfully, of course. No cats, though I did ask him to consider smuggling them in. I asked more than once, too.
So. That’s what is on my mind today. I’ll leave it there for now, this whole sharing thing is new to me. A bit like meeting a new friend, and not wanting to scare them away with too much information.
Thanks for letting me share, and letting me shed a bit too.
Laura, I’m sorry to hear about the upcoming surgery that you have to go through. My thoughts are with you. Thanks for sharing with us. It’s nothing wrong with sharing these kind of news in a blog. It makes us more humans and personal. I’m with you on the tons things to do that we need to accomplish. But sometimes, if we need to pause, then let it be. That will stressed you out even more than you need to.
Good idea to remember to pause, Nat. And your 2nd part of that – “then let it be” is equally important. I hope to remind myself to do both ongoing. Thanks!
Hi Laura, what a rough story. You are brave! I will be thinking about you!! xo
Thanks Amy, some days I don’t feel so brave, so thanks for saying that! 🙂
So kind of you to “let us in” to your struggles and reality. Prayers for you as you enter these next few weeks. 🙂 ~ Kim @ Sand & Sisal
Thank you Kim, for your note above and your prayers!
Steph @ The Silly Pearl
Thank you for such an honest post! Praying that everything goes well with your surgery.
Thank you Steph for your words and your prayers. I appreciate both!
I am sorry to hear what you are going through. I think this is a great place to share what is going on in your life Glad you decided to talk about it here. I hope all goes well with the surgery and you recovery quickly. You will be in my thoughts.
Hi Terri, Blogging is still so “new” to me in terms of having my own blog, but I do agree with you: I’m glad I decided to talk about the surgery here. Thank you!
Laura, not again! You’ve just come back, we missed you last year. I do hope everything turns out okay with your surgery.
And I agree with you about the “messy”–send it out there, see what people think! Some days I post a sketch I really don’t like, and people love it because it says something to them. Even though we are the ones who create, it’s not all about us.
Hi Bernadette – I know, right?!? Although I can’t imagine you ever doing a bad sketch you don’t like, you have reminded me of a wonderful point: even though we are the ones who create, it’s not all about us. Thanks for that!
Laura, I hope that all goes well with your surgery. Thanks so much for sharing. You’ll be in my thoughts in the coming weeks.
Thank you Heidi, that means a lot, and I know I’ll be virtually “leaning” on all the good thoughts coming my way. 🙂
Oh Laura. Thank you for sharing your blog with all of us.Having never gone through a major surgery all I can add is to send as many angels as I can for you.I/ we do as many many health herb things as we can and can tell you tea made of stinging nettle is extremely good as well as juicing fresh cranberries.(has to be fresh) My husband has has issues in the past and it is amazing.My healthy , strong, quick recovery thoughts will be with you over the next three weeks. Please take care and keep us posted.
Much love and Light Kat
Oh Kat – thanks for the suggestions – I’ve heard about the stinging nettle tea from a few others, so definitely will look into that, and I love fresh cranberries too. Win-Win!
Sorry to hear that you have to have surgery! I’ve had three over my lifetime for various things and they are never fun. On the bright side, your husband will probably be extra, extra, extra nice, and perhaps he’ll even smuggle a cat in for a brief visit. And if not, hopefully he’ll smuggle you in some good food! 😀
Best of luck with the surgery and hope you make a speedy recovery!
Thanks Melissa – I’m still workin’ on the smuggling of cats. 😉 On another note: congratulations to YOU on your new baby boy and new motherhood too! 🙂
My Dear Girl! Some years just seem to be ‘messier’ than others eh? But, Good Grief!!! This is starting to borderline something a bit more than messy….perhaps ‘Quagie’ (as in quagmireish) would be a little closer to the truth. Nevertheless, you will get through it because we all DO what MUST be DONE. If you email me your mailing address, I’ll get a purple heart HERE out to you ASAP!!!!
MCatherine, I like the word “quagie” – almost sounds like a cute name for a pet. “Come to momma, Quagie… good boy!” 🙂 And as always: you are too sweet!
Handmade in Israel
Wishing you a very speedy recovery. Your blog post was very meaningful and exactly the right choice of words. Good luck!
Thank you Lisa, for your wishes and your comments. Both mean so much to me. Hugs!
I wish you the best with your upcoming surgery. I hope you won’t stay away from your blog – as I am subscribing to your updates, I find it that I am looking forward to your posts 🙂
Good luck and keep us posted!
Thank you so much Anca, and I promise to keep up with updates! 🙂
Ann - AnnDesigned
I’m so sorry that you are going through this – I know surgery can be scary. Sounds like you have a great support network which is a blessing. Maybe being away from your cats will motivate you to recover as quickly as possible so you can get home to them. I know how hard it can be to be separated from your “children”!
Thanks Ann! That’s a good point about missing the cats actually motivating me to get myself up and outta that hospital! Let’s hope it works. 🙂
Good luck, Laura! You’ve whupped bigger things than this, and I’m sure that when it’s done, you’ll be talking all kinds of smack to the experience (“Is THAT all you’ve got? My grandma could knock me out worse than you.”). Hope you’re back in fighting form soon! -Anne
Thanks Anne! Your comments just put me in a feisty go-get-’em mood. 🙂 Love it! Thanks so very much!